It is clear from the scriptural teachings that there are three reasons why our prayers, as Christians, are not heard by God: We have unconfessed sins in our life and God will not honor our prayers; we ask for selfish things that are nothing more than desires to appease the flesh; and we fail to believe that God will provide the things we need and have asked for in our prayers. As a child of God, His love for us is unconditional and nothing (or no one) can separate us from the love of God; this is taught by the apostle Paul: Nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord (Romans 8:39) and by Jesus during His earthly ministry: And I give unto them eternal life; and they shall never perish, neither shall any man pluck them out of my hand. My Father, which gave them me, is greater than all; and no man is able to pluck them out of my Father’s hand (John 10:28-29). But when we are acting or praying outside the will of God, He cannot – because of his Divine holiness – grant us our requests.
The other thing that God wants from us is sincerity in our prayers. In the book of Psalms, we can look into David’s soul and see the sincerity of his prayers to God. In some of the chapters, he prays for God’s deliverance from his enemies and from sin. In some, he prays for the death of his enemies and victory in his life. David was a man who had no problems praying and understood what Paul would try to encourage Christians in our prayer lives: Let us therefore come boldly unto the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy, and find grace to help in time of need (Hebrews 4:16). Just as David was, we need to learn to be honest in our prayer life and pour ourselves out in front of our Heavenly Father. This very idea is taught by Paul: For as many as are led by the Spirit of God, they are the sons of God. For ye have not received the spirit of bondage again to fear; but ye have received the Spirit of adoption, whereby we cry, Abba, Father (Romans 8:14-15).
Being the father of a three-year old daughter, I encourage her to tell me what she wants or how she is feeling. Yes, there are times she will look at me and tell me, “Daddy, I am mad at you…” and I do not get mad at her, but instead I explain to her why she didn’t get what she wanted or what she wanted to do. Even though she does not understand in that moment that I do know what is best for her, she will eventually understand someday. It is the same principle with God; He knows what we need, he sees what lies ahead of us, regardless of the choices we make: (For after all these things do the Gentiles seek:) for your heavenly Father knoweth that ye have need of all these things (Matthew 6:32). Many times, our prayers are not answered because we are not sincere when we ask of God and we really do not want to hear His answer if it is different from what we expect. We adopt the attitude of rebellion against God simply because we do not get our way.
Having a healthy prayer life is more than just telling God our hidden desires, wants, and needs. It is about adopting an attitude of prayer in all that we do. There is no place that bears this out as well as the writings of the apostle Paul. His letters contain a wealth of guidance for the Christian who is serious in building a strong faith; to the Christians in Thessalonike, he encouraged them to Pray without ceasing (I Thessalonians 5:17). This advice is still just as good for today’s Christian as it were for those Christians living in the first half-century of Christianity. Imagine the impact God’s children would have if we would just pray and make an effort to be honest with God. Do your prayers cause you to weep? Are you afraid to hear what’s in your heart? Is your heart so broken that you do not know where to begin? Just do as David did and pour your heart – in all your sincerity and honesty – out before God. It does make that much of a difference.
