Learning to listen – an important trait of faith

Posted on November 29, 2016 by | Comments Off on Learning to listen – an important trait of faith

How-To-Listen

There are people hurting everywhere.  Sometimes, we are the ones who hurt. Sometimes, it’s the cashier at our local gas station, our mail carrier, family member, or close friend.  Maybe it is the person we come across only once in our life, but one thing remains the same about each of these – when we are hurting, sometimes all we want and need is for someone to listen.  The generations that are alive right now are considered as the most isolated generations in all of human existence.  We have computers, Internet, instant messaging, Skype, Facebook, Twitter, and a whole horde of other technology based gadgets and programs for making communication easier, yet we are more “unplugged” from each other than ever before.  We have lost the ability to listen to one another.

Learning to listen means putting things down

I will be completely honest; I didn’t start learning to listen until the Lord me with a daughter when I was 40. It wasn’t until my daughter hit four that I really understood that I truly didn’t know how to listen to others. She was having a bad day and was upset that nothing she tried to do was working. Since most of the courses I teach are on-line, I do most of my work from home at the family dining room table. So, that particular day, I made her lunch and sat back down at the table. She started talking to me and soon realized I was only partially listening. She got up from the table, walked around until she was beside me, then said, “Daddy, you’re not listening. Please pay attention…”

Within the King James Version of the Bible, the word “hearken” means listen. There’s a verse David wrote, Come, ye children, hearken unto me: I will teach you the fear of the LORD (Psalms 34:11) where he is inviting others to listen to what it means to truly follow after the Lord. It is a humbling experience to realize we listen without really paying attention to what is being said. Within my own Bible study, there’s been times where I will read a passage but because I’m not really listening to the Lord, I simply don’t get it. Then there are those times when I can read the same passage and the Lord shows me just what I needed for that day. The difference is in our willingness to listen.

Listening means setting aside the distractions

There are times we need to listen but our attentions are divided among many different things. I love the term, multi-tasking; it simply means “I’m working hard but won’t get anything totally finished…” At four years old, my daughter was wise enough to know she needed my undivided attention focused on her so that I could understand what she was trying to say. It is the same thing with Bible study. It’s hard to understand the message the Lord has for me when I read my Bible with the television on or with the many other distractions that often fills my day. 

Listening to my daughter meant turning away from my lap top and focusing solely on her and my conversation. Listening to the Lord means the same thing. It means purposely setting aside all else and focusing on the Lord. Since 2006, I have learned I gain more from my personal time with the Lord when all distractions are put away. We have become so accustomed to doing a half-dozen things at one time and if we are honest about it, none of them are completed as good as we could if we just focused on one thing at a time. 

Listening means gaining understanding

There are a couple of verses in Psalms that illustrate a difference in knowing and understanding. These two verses, Thy hands have made me and fashioned me: give me understanding, that I may learn thy commandments (Psalm 119:73) and My mouth shall speak of wisdom; and the meditation of my heart shall be of understanding (Psalms 49:3) show there is more than knowing. We gain an understanding of God’s plan when we become determined to seek Him out. David was asking not just to know God’s law, but to understand God’s law. David could only gain understanding by learning how to listen.

When it comes to listening to others, it is easy to simply casually listen, claiming we already know the gist of the conversation. Frankly, I’ve done that many times myself; the question is now, do I understand what they are saying? Do I understand how what they are sharing has affected them? Do I understand the need they must have to take a risk by sharing it with me? Truly learning to listen means we are willing to gain an understanding about the one speaking to us, about what they are talking about, and even about ourselves.

Learning to listen goes against our fleshly nature

I had a bit of an attitude problem when the Lord first laid on my heart that I needed to learn to listen. I didn’t understand there was a difference between hearing and listening. Listening is when we open ourselves to truly receiving what the other person is trying to say. If I am not careful, I still find myself falling back on not really listening as my daughter tries to talk with me. I honestly believe it goes against our fleshly nature to truly listen to someone else. We approach so much of life with preconceived notions of what we think is fair, of our own importance and abilities, and value.

It is not natural to subordinate ourselves to a lower and more humble place, yet that is what Jesus calls us to do: Whosoever therefore shall humble himself as this little child, the same is greatest in the kingdom of heaven (Matthew 18:4). As a college level instructor, I’m also learning to put this into practice for the first time this semester. I’ve noticed it does make a difference for some and actually catches others off-guard. Again, it took me stepping away from how I saw myself and putting into practice the very things the Lord teaches us to do. It also gives me an opportunity to share the gospel with students when they ask me why am I different from the other instructors they’ve encountered on campus. 

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Breakwaters of faith and their role in our life

Posted on October 18, 2016 by | Comments Off on Breakwaters of faith and their role in our life
breakwaters

© Micha Fleuren | Dreamstime Stock Photos

Breakwaters play an important role in modern society but many of us never bother to think about them. Even when I lived on the Gulf Coast  I never really paid much attention to what had become a common item. I watched the television reports of the damage caused by Hurricane Matthew as it churned its way up the East Coast of the United States. One news broadcast contained a weatherman in Charleston after the hurricane had passed that city.  Although he was highlighting the damage to the area near him, the breakwaters did their job. The beach behind him was in better shape than the rest of the area!

What is a breakwater?

As defined in Merriam-Webster’s Dictionary Online, a breakwater is a wall that is built out into the sea to protect a harbor or beach from the force of waves. For the past few days I’ve been thinking about the breakwaters God intended us to have within our faith. On Wednesday evening of this past week, I was able to attend midweek services with my in-laws. The services yesterday at my local corps (this is what the Salvation Army calls its local congregations), both the morning and the evening services seemed to brush against a similar topic as Wednesday’s service. A part of our growing faith in Jesus creates such a breakwater for us to be able to bear the storms we will face.

Real storms, such as Hurricane Matthew, teaches us about the preparations made by a community for such storms. Right now, even as clean-up continues, many towns, counties, and states are already reviewing what was learned and are making preparations for the next big storm. A spiritual storm can teach us a lot about who we really are, show us where we need improvement, and will allow us to grow in our faith.

We must develop spiritual breakwaters

When I briefly lived in Gulfport, Mississippi, I learned that after Hurricane Camille, nearly every public and private organization studied ways that could have reduced the impact of that storm. By the mid 1970s, breakwaters were added along key areas of the Gulf Coast spanning from Louisiana to Florida. Within our Christian walk, we must prepare for the spiritual storms. I think of the application of what Solomon wrote, The ants are a people not strong, yet they prepare their meat in the summer; (Proverbs 30:25). Already in our house, we see the occasional ant scurrying around, looking for crumbs – in preparation for winter. Solomon is advising us to pay attention to the ant and understand a simple lesson. They prepare for the bad storms now, when things are going well. It would be too late to try to gather food for the colony during the winter.

Since 2006, I have noticed changes in my spiritual walk with the Lord. At first, even the smallest storm would send waves of doubt into my mind. I would doubt my sincerity to Christ, I would doubt His forgiveness being complete, I would doubt that He could love someone as wretched as me. The problem was not Jesus’ love for me at all; the problem was I didn’t have any breakwaters to meet Satan’s spiritual attacks. Satan is not dumb. Too many Christians underestimate his ability to trip up and bring spiritual chaos to even the strongest of Christians. Remember the warning by Peter, Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil, as a roaring lion, walketh about, seeking whom he may devour (1 Peter 5:8). 

The breakwater of asking forgiveness of our sins

Earlier this morning I was deleting some old photos off my smart phone. I came across a photo I had taken of the weekly question written on a dry erase board we use for our pre-teen Sunday school class. The question was, “Why does it seem that it takes God so long to help me when I’m in trouble?” This is a question that all Christians, at some point in our walk, will ask God. The apostle Paul, when explaining the Lord’s Supper, said: But let a man examine himself, and so let him eat of that bread, and drink of that cup (1 Corinthians 11:28). This examination does not begin with anything other than us examining all we do through the lens of scripture.

This is the first and important breakwater of our faith. Paul tells us why this self-examination is so important: For if we would judge ourselves, we should not be judged. But when we are judged, we are chastened of the Lord, that we should not be condemned with the world (1 Corinthians 11:31-32). When we examine ourselves honestly through scripture, we have an opportunity to confess our sins, our failures, and shortcomings before God begins to deal with us about them. When we are in the middle of a spiritual storm, there are times when the Lord will not intervene until we confess our sins that separate us from His boundless grace and love.

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Little things can make a difference in all we do

Posted on September 28, 2016 by | Comments Off on Little things can make a difference in all we do
little things

© Fedor Patrakov | Dreamstime Stock Photos

Little things do make a difference. Those who know me will tell you I am a details-oriented person. For me, it’s the little things that make a difference in all that I do. Whether it is for my job, for a project, or even just piddling around the house, details make a difference. This morning while doing my morning exercise routine, I decided to increase my route by a mile. Today was my regular walking day so I was listening to Southern Gospel music on an old MP3 player as I took to the hills of Elm Street in Henderson, Kentucky. Little did I know the spiritual lesson the Lord had in store for me this morning.

We serve a God that’s aware of the little things!

Fall has arrived in Henderson, Kentucky. Already, leaves are beginning to change from green to various shades of red, orange, and bright yellow. Most of all, there are other details – just little things – the Lord created to show to all who will look of the change of seasons. As I walked up the first hill at the corner of Elm Street and Powell, I brushed against a small bush and didn’t think much else about it. I continued to walk up the hill, looking at the faded blooms of summer. More little details that summer is over and winter is approaching. As I approached the intersection of Elm and Clay, I noticed an apple core someone had tossed out on the street. Ants had already found it and were busy taking it, piece by piece, to their hill in someone’s yard.

Immediately, I thought of this passage in Proverbs,  Go to the ant, thou sluggard; consider her ways, and be wise:  Which having no guide, overseer, or ruler,  Provideth her meat in the summer, and gathereth her food in the harvest.  How long wilt thou sleep, O sluggard? when wilt thou arise out of thy sleep? (Proverbs 6:6-9). Most of us never even take much thought about ants unless we see them crawling across the counter top in the kitchen or we’ve managed to get bitten by them. Nevertheless, they are little things created by God and have a divine purpose. They serve as an object lesson to us and are a part of God’s plan that keeps our world going. Most of the time, their efforts go totally unnoticed by us; they keep doing what they are supposed to do anyway.

Little things matter in what we do for others

There’s a passage in the book of Matthew that reads, Therefore when thou doest thine alms, do not sound a trumpet before thee, as the hypocrites do in the synagogues and in the streets, that they may have glory of men. Verily I say unto you, They have their reward.  But when thou doest alms, let not thy left hand know what thy right hand doeth: That thine alms may be in secret: and thy Father which seeth in secret himself shall reward thee openly (Matthew 6:1-4). As I was preparing to do today’s devotional, I thought about the teaching of this verse. Often we focus on the financial aspects of what the alms mean. I’ve even heard radio preachers try to put an exact dollar amount on it. This completely misses the point of what Jesus was trying to make.

When we feel moved by the Holy Spirit of the Lord to do something for someone else, no matter how small or large it is, we need to simply do it and not make any note of it. I’ll use my six-year old daughter as an example of this.  Earlier last week, without me asking her to, she went upstairs and brought down a roll of toilet paper to replace the empty roll in the bathroom downstairs. She didn’t even point it out. Later that afternoon, I noticed it had been replaced, so I asked her. She said, “Oh, Dad, I knew it had to be done so I just did it…” She then explained it made her feel good to something good to help. My daughter also felt that it wasn’t a big deal and was something that needed to be done anyway.

Little details in relationships go a long way

I shared that little story about my daughter to illustrate how a little detail such as her bringing down a roll of toilet paper can make a big difference in a parent-child relationship. It works both ways; my daughter thrives on such little things. A quick trip to Evansville on a Saturday afternoon, an unexpected play time where she gets to pick a game from the game closet, or even making one of her favorite meals – are all little details that let her know she’s cared and loved in our family. It doesn’t stop there. It’s the little details we do that go largely unnoticed by others that demonstrates our love for the Lord and for them. It can be something as simple as starting a pot of coffee, ironing a shirt, or whatever you can think of – these little details are important to those we love.

Our attitude about the little things has to be right and we have to have the purest of motives. You cannot have an expectation of getting something in return for what you’ve done. It sabotages what we’ve done and will only cause others to question why we do the things we do. When I was living in graduate housing in Carbondale, Illinois, I had neighbors that kept score over who did what and when. Everyone would hear the arguments that would happen when one spouse felt slighted by the other. Consequently, their relationship didn’t last long. Not only did they demand the little things from the other, they had an expectation that whatever they did for the other, the other would reciprocate. This is not in the right spirit of how we are to approach the idea of doing things for others. 

Get out there and do…

As I made my way back towards home this morning, I watched an older lady watering plants on her front porch. Her husband came onto the porch with a pitcher of water and asked her to hand him her watering can. When she thanked him and asked about his reasoning to help her with her chore, he said “just consider it as an ‘I love you…’ ” and with that, he went back into the house. Now I will be the first to admit I know nothing about those two; I’ve never walked that route before today. However, from that one act of “little things” her husband did and her reaction to it, it was clear they regularly do such tokens of love for one another.

I’m resolved more than ever to pay attention to these little things – but not only for my family but for those I encounter throughout the week. My heart’s desire is to make a difference in the life of someone each and every day. I want that difference to point them to Jesus, my Lord and Savior.

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